Monday, August 08, 2011

Conformity to be or not to be?

During yet another night of insomnia (seriously?) I was waxing nostalgic. I was trying to remember the moves to a certain cheer (yes, I was a cheerleader) that we did in H.S.

While looking on FB for former cheerleading friends, I noticed that so many (read: all) were married with children. Just like the sitcom said. And for a moment, I was sad.

I am not married. I don't have children. What was wrong with me?

And then I realized: Fucking Nothing.

I don't want kids. 1) the world does not need more people. 2) I don't actually like kids. 3) I have a lot of stuff on my plate that I love that, if I had kids, would have to wait another 2o years give or take.

I was married. Didn't like it much. I wander a bit here and there and fluctuate in my ... desires. OK - I'm a hedonist. And until I find someone that I love enough to share a hedonistic lifestyle with (and it can be done, witness Ultimate Leo Party 2011) well, not so much with the interest.

I was often berated in school for not being "non-conformist enough" to be "non-conformist." But here I am, unmarried, childless and still searching for meaning of Life, the Universe and Everything. So who's non-conformist now bitches?

And in all of this - I do NOT in any way demean those who have partners, jobs, children, careers. I admire those who can and do. I'm just saying, for me, not so much. And I'm TOTALLY okay with that.

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