A few years ago, upon the eve of my High School Reunion, I made the comment that it would be odd to show up with no husband, no children, no family. A very insightful and very dear friend took that opportunity to point out that the 'traditional" were never things I'd aspired to. That's not to demean those choices - just that they were never right for me.
And I know this is not nearly the same thing as a mother for her children. But, Peepers is sick.
She's got a kidney infection and, while the vet seems confident of her full recovery, I am petrified. I keep watching her, obsessed that she seems sullen, lethargic or miserable. Of course it's not the same as having a child. But with her in the vet office today, the house felt unmistakably lonely. Sure, Eliza is there with her cries and nudges. But the staid and aloof attidtude of the Peeps was definitely missing.I've joked for a long time that I am a "crazy cat lady." Guess it turns out that there's more to it than a joke.
I'm sure there is some deep, insightful metaphor or meaning to all of this. And maybe tomorrow I'll figure it out. But tonight, I'll settle for watchin my Lamby Pie Petunia sleep on the edge of the bed...
Right now, she seems so content and restful. Here's hoping that it is a sign of things to come...
