Am I Good Enough? Smart Enough? Do People Like Me?

I went on a job interview today - with a well-known and well-respected agency north of Boston. I have no idea how it went. When I interview - especially with so many smart and talented people, all the damn insecurities creep out. So, I wind up clamming up, getting nervous, and basically turning into Freakazoid. And then I get to my car and realize all the things I shoulda woulda said.

I was much more relaxed and had a much better meeting with the second person I met. Unfortunately, he's not the hiring manager. Still, he does influence the hiring manager, so there's that. Plus, I have two folks on the inside that I like and respect on this inside rooting for me.

Here's the thing - and I know this is premature. If I get this gig, my whole life would change. Goodbye leaving early to catch the yoga class w/ the awesome teacher. Goodbye being able to goof off a fair amount b/c there's no one in the office to tell. Of course, there's also the fact that it would allow my creativity to flourish, would pay better, wouldn't involve Napolean, and could even (theoretically) support a move to Salem or Gloucester.

So, I've got lots of thinking to do if - and that's a big IF - I land this gig...

In other news, I went to yoga tonight, to calm down, so to speak. Afterwards, I noticed a fellow student getting into a car with an Anusara bumper sticker. So we start chatting and it sounds like she's connected in with other local Anusarians. Instant kula! She gave me her email and I'm gonna send her a mail tomorrow. Maybe, just maybe, finally some friends....

So with that, I'm gonna stop shoulding all over myself, Stuart Smalley.