Wednesday, March 17, 2010

Back on the mat

You may have noticed that I haven't posted about yoga in awhile. That's because I haven't been on the mat in ages. I even stopped wearing my Om necklace because I felt hypocritical. How could I claim to be a yogini when I hadn't done a downward dog in months?

Tonight, I practiced. I've been using a million reasons to talk myself out of taking a class. Too tired, too cold, too much work to do. But the reality is, I couldn't fathom spending an hour and a half facing my true self. Cuz that's what yoga is really about. Yea, the postures make you strong and lean and improve your body through alignment, stretching and detoxification. But in the end it's all about finding the stillness amidst the activity, the mind race, the chatter. How could I endure that for an hour and a half?

Well, today, I did it. I didn't give myself the chance to second guess myself. At 5:30, I shut off the computer, packed up and walked down the street.

I'm going to be sore sore sore tomorrow. But it felt like coming home. My practice has declined a lot - poses that used to be a cake walk I struggled with. But they felt good and they felt right. And, during Sivasana, I found that brief, clear, moment of stillness. Namaste!