Mabon

Mabon, (pronounced MAY-bun, MAY-bone, MAH-boon, or MAH-bawn) is the Autumn Equinox. The Autumn Equinox divides the day and night equally, and we all take a moment to pay our respects to the impending dark. We also give thanks to the waning sunlight, as we store our harvest of this year's crops.

Mabon is considered a time of the Mysteries. It is a time to honor Aging Deities and the Spirit World. Considered a time of balance, it is when we stop and relax and enjoy the fruits of our personal harvests, whether they be from toiling in our gardens, working at our jobs, raising our families, or just coping with the hussle-bussle of everyday life. May your Mabon be memorable, and your hearts and spirits be filled to overflowing!

Why I Love Yoga

I've said it before and I'll say it again. I love yoga because it always always gives you exactly what you need.

Just got an email in from one of the many Yoga newsletters I'm on. This weekend is the celebration of International Peace Day, marked by the Global Mala project. And there's a studio near me that's hosting an event.

108 minutes of Sun Salutations to bring about peace. 4 rounds of 27 in this order:

Round One: Dedications for Personal Transformation and Realization.
Round Two: Dedications for Family, Friends and Precious Jewels
Round Three: Dedications for the World
Round Four: Dedications to the Source

Is this exactly what I needed or what?

Join in folks! You can practice in your living room, in your backyard, in your car. If you can't do a Sun Salutation, practice pranayama or just sit. It's for PEACE people.

Namaste.

Relationship 2.0

What I learned at therapy tonight:

If you do not learn from history, you are doomed to repeat it.

To this I say: DUH.

And yet, I obviously had to 1) live through it again 2) pay someone for 45 minutes of time to realize this.

Let's raise a glass in defense of V3.0.

Focus

At writing group last night, we had a High Fidelity moment - the three out of five of us who are suffering through/recovering from recent breakups made a list of top five breakup songs of all time. (I'm slightly embarrassed to say this conversation was brought on by my mention of the recent ticket purchase to the Morrissey show. Moz, how I love thee!)

So, in honor of Nick Hornby and John Cusack I give you ...

Good things that have happened to me in one week:

1. I got a new job
2. Awesome yoga teacher is back teaching evenings
3. I got to tell HR what I think of Napolean w/out fear
4. I found out my gym has a "sister" gym exactly 3.6 miles from my new office. No joining fees!
5. I don't have to go to FL for a tradeshow so I can go to the Eye of the Tiger class with Todd Norian and Ann Green
6. I got a week's delay on my start date so I have a week to scratch my ass (or, more likely, hike and write)
7. Morrissey tickets
8. I've reconnected with some old and new friends - amazing people all
9. I've lost five more pounds (ah, the grief diet)
10. I signed up for NaNoWriMo (details forthcoming)

If you look for the good in things, you're sure to find it -- Pollyanna

Doors. Windows.

Things in my life are moving at such a hectic pace.

My friend today told me, "I've never seen anyone more in tune with the energy of The Universe." I guess I kind of see what she means. Of course, I didn't actually want The Universe to make my boyfriend break up with me. But who am I to question divine wisdom?

I got the offer today. And it is truly an offer I can't refuse. OK, I could refuse it, but then I'd be dumber than a bag of hammers.

In so many ways it seems so perfect. A great job in a great location with great people. I mean, seriously, an olde manse on a hill in the middle of a forest? A house that's filled with spiralling staircases, wrought iron detailing, and a ghost? A chance to work with old and new friends (I already know two people that work there!). A reason to move to the North Shore - Salem, Gloucester, Manchester. Better pay (by a lot). Better benefits (by even more). And only one day's difference in vacation time. Not to even mention the chance to throw Napolean under the bus with my resignation letter....

So, what the...?

Well, what's really and truly making me sad in the midst of all this fabulous opportunity is this. I'm making this huge life decision without Mr. Zips by my side.

I know (IknowIknowIknowIknow) I've been feeling the Stage:Anger portion of grief for a bit now. It's a coping mechanism, a tool to help me move on, move past. But the reality is that I am still so damn sad. So damn heartbroken. So crushed.

And so I don't want to make this decision without him. Not that I have a choice. Not that I can call him up and tell him the news much less ask his opinion. But how sad it is that I have to.

Slacky said this to me today: "Well, I guess this is like they say, when a door closes a window opens."

I told him: Sometimes there's a part of you that really (really) wishes that you could leave that door open a tiny, little crack, just so the nightlight will shine through.