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One of the MAJOR drawbacks of being a theatre geek is that there is a showtune for every occasion. And for the past three days I've had, "Who Am I?" from Les Miz running through my brain.

The Universe has given me the ultimate Clean Slate. New Job. Newly unattached. A chance to move to a new home. So, who will the new me be?

On Sunday, I went up to Gloucester and was amazed. Immediately came home and started dialing numbers listed in the For Rent pages. I started imagining apartments. Places where I could start a new future - places where my new life would take shape. What would this future look like? What was perfection for me?

One apartment sounded great. Two plus bedroom in an old Victorian, porch, quiet neighborhood, one block from the beach, around the corner from the train station, 4 miles from the new office, same neighborhood as my "sister gym." Then I saw it.

To say it was in bad shape is an understatement. There was still a Red Sox calendar and Patriots poster on the wall from the last tenants. The bathroom was pink. And that's only the tip of the iceberg.

So, okay, apartment not for me. So I drove to the next showing in downtown Salem. This apartment was FABULOUS. Brand spanking new building - just gutted and completely refabbed. Above a vegetarian restaurant and in the quiet section of downtown Salem. So, what's the drawback? Well, aside from the uber high price tag, the apartment just didn't seem me. It was sleek and shiny. But there was no room in the kitchen for storage, for extra soup cans, bags of rice, plates and coffee mugs. It was a kitchen for a person who eats an awful lot of takeout. And my bookshelves would look horribly old-fashioned in there, with their books that have actually been read and have the dogears and coffee stains to prove it. And to top it off, while I love Salem, I wouldn't exactly be in the midst of nature, living above a restaurant on a city square street.

So, driving home, I was in a bit of despair. Where - for that matter, when - would I find the right apartment? An apartment with character that was still clean and fresh. An apartment that let me adore nature and still curl up in a cozy, wuzzy nook and read or nap.

And then, staring at the moon and deciding I would let The Universe steer me right, my phone rang. There's an apartment in E. Gloucester, right off Niles Beach. 5 mins from the highway. Porch. Stained glass windows. I asked and the landlord said it was clean, repainted, refreshed. Now, I'm not taking her word for it, but it has potential. And, who knows, maybe it will be rented by the time I go look at it before the workshop on Saturday. But maybe, just maybe, it won't be.

I wish that everything was all settled and set and done. You know how I hate to be off kilter. But right now I guess I just have to trust that The Universe will help me discover who I am - and what I want.

Of course, here's the one drawback to not taking the Salem apartment. Real Estate guy who showed me around? MAJOR cute.

The Power of the Leafy Greens

I went hiking up in Gloucester today. Partly to get out of the house on a beautiful Autumnal Equinox day. Partially to see what the North Shore neighborhoods had to offer. To perk up my mood (which was pretty bleak this a.m., truth be told) I wore my recent purchase from eatmorekale.com - a cheery Eat More Kale tee in seafoam green. Will be perfect for upcoming Mozz show....

Hiking makes me happy in ways that few other things do. The physical exertion, the scent of the trees, the occasional wildlife encounter. (Hello snake, my animal totem of old...) And it doesn't hurt if the trail you're following winds up at the top of a hill that overlooks Gloucester Harbor. Sun sparkling off ocean, lighthouse, white sails, treetops turning brilliant shades of red, yellow, orange...

Of course, the effort made me sweaty and hungry. So I picked up a local newspaper and stopped into a restaurant downtown for "big fuhd" and a peruse of the local Apartments for Rent ads.

I was deliberately trying not to notice the two gals that sat in a nearby booth that kept glancing over. Was I that messy from the hike? Did I have dirt smeared on my cheeks? What?!?

"I really like your shirt." Smile. "Where'd you get it?" (Is it me or did she do a flirtatious hair flip? No, it must be me.)

So, I told her and FriendGal and blahblahblah farmers' market blahblahblah yoga blahblahblah might know someone with an apartment opening up blahblahblah. Suffice to say, phone numbers were gathered.

So, blah blah blah, Girlfriend's still got game.

Mabon

Mabon, (pronounced MAY-bun, MAY-bone, MAH-boon, or MAH-bawn) is the Autumn Equinox. The Autumn Equinox divides the day and night equally, and we all take a moment to pay our respects to the impending dark. We also give thanks to the waning sunlight, as we store our harvest of this year's crops.

Mabon is considered a time of the Mysteries. It is a time to honor Aging Deities and the Spirit World. Considered a time of balance, it is when we stop and relax and enjoy the fruits of our personal harvests, whether they be from toiling in our gardens, working at our jobs, raising our families, or just coping with the hussle-bussle of everyday life. May your Mabon be memorable, and your hearts and spirits be filled to overflowing!

Why I Love Yoga

I've said it before and I'll say it again. I love yoga because it always always gives you exactly what you need.

Just got an email in from one of the many Yoga newsletters I'm on. This weekend is the celebration of International Peace Day, marked by the Global Mala project. And there's a studio near me that's hosting an event.

108 minutes of Sun Salutations to bring about peace. 4 rounds of 27 in this order:

Round One: Dedications for Personal Transformation and Realization.
Round Two: Dedications for Family, Friends and Precious Jewels
Round Three: Dedications for the World
Round Four: Dedications to the Source

Is this exactly what I needed or what?

Join in folks! You can practice in your living room, in your backyard, in your car. If you can't do a Sun Salutation, practice pranayama or just sit. It's for PEACE people.

Namaste.

Relationship 2.0

What I learned at therapy tonight:

If you do not learn from history, you are doomed to repeat it.

To this I say: DUH.

And yet, I obviously had to 1) live through it again 2) pay someone for 45 minutes of time to realize this.

Let's raise a glass in defense of V3.0.