Wednesday, March 30, 2011

So much good - so little bad

But why do we focus on the bad? I'm not Thich Nat Han or Depak Chopra, so I don't know. I just know what is for me. I've had an awesome week full of job offers and friend making and fitness goal-reaching. So why, at 11:30 pm - am I stressing about the fact that GoodBuddy is steadily making his way up the East Coast Seaboard? I told him outright that I need to do some thinking about whether or not seeing him would do me any good. Sure, I want (desperately want) to see him. But would the harm outweigh the good? After all, that's what my entire session with Awesome Therapist was about this week. There are things that annoy or disturb or dissapoint us. And sometimes, they're unbearable. But sometimes they are the price we pay for a greater good. It is the job of a healthy mind to distinguish the two. So what do I do now? I have no idea. And although this has been one of the most fantastic weeks of my recent life, I'm still unsure. I feel like I'm strong enough to see him and hold my own and not freak out. But I worry that my love (and we all know absence makes the heart grow fonder...) will cloud my judgement. I want more than anything to see him. Hold him. Smell that scent that is uniquely his, hear the laugh that is uniquely his. But what price will I have to pay for that experience? I worry that the price is too high... Details to follow