Been having a complicated week. Lots of stress w/ Good Buddy - altho he's finally owned up and said, yes, he screwed up and this pretty much was all his fault. Some stress w/ work peeps, altho that's also pretty much resolved itself. And then mucho happiness w/ a 15 mile bike ride, some ocean gazing, a hike and beach walking in bare feet.
So, good times, bad times, in between times.
What I have realized is that I CAN be in control of my life. Whether I am making decisions that will be for my higher good or not, they are decisions I am making. I'm not being tossed about by the waves any longer.
I know, for example, that I have more than 30 emails from CBL in my inbox. But it is Sunday. The Lord's day of rest (grin). And so I shan't look at them until tomorrow. Afternoon, because I have a mtg starting at nine. And that's when the work day begins. And my time is my time.
I also know that the best thing for me to be doing right now is to be out enjoying the sunshine and warmth. But right now, I feel like hunkering down in the dark, cuddling w/ my kitties and being sad. Not despondent, but sad. So that is what I will do.
All in all, feeling this way is a good thing. Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate, our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure.
Amen and Hallelujia!