My New Normal

For a few months, I've been taking a class at the gym called Group Power. It's a lifting class using a bar and weight plates and enough reps to make the sweat drip down your face. The format is always the same -- warm-up, legs, chest, back & legs, triceps, biceps, lunges, shoulders, core and stretch. And you do the same routine for three months. The idea is, by the end of the three month session, you've built up strength and increased your weight factor.

The way you remember what weight you should use is judged by your "normal" weight. Your normal weight is the weight you use during warm up. For every exercise, you either add or subtract from your normal weight. And, by the end of the three month session, you should be using a "new normal."

I tell you all of this to illustrate how amazingly adaptive the human animal is. You see, my life is experiencing a "new normal."

I've been living the past few months as if I were all settled. I love my home, I love my hometown. I mostly like my job. I had a budget and a plan for the future. And then, there was this re-org. And news of possible layoffs. And news that my head was very likely on the chopping block.

And so, for almost two weeks, I've been living in this zone of not knowing what's around the corner. Do I have a job? Will I be able to keep my apartment? Will I be able to afford yoga? A vacation? A haircut? Food? Every moment is filled with uncertainty, equal parts doubt and hope.
But, somehow, I've become accustomed to this new life of constant stress and anxiety. It's become my new normal.

I can't - of course - equate it to people living in war zones or disaster epicenters. Except, it kind of is. In all cases, people find ways to muddle through, adapt, make the best, keep on keepin on. My situation is no where near as dire, heroic, or valiant, as theirs. But the principle is the same.

The only solace I am finding in any of this is that, if we keep adapting to our new normals, we will, indeed, grow stronger.

"One must imagine Sisyphus happy."

Did Someone Say Heatwave?

It's 95 degrees out and humid as all Eich Eeee Double Hockeysticks. So why, oh why, would the air conditioning at work be running?

Sweat equity anyone?

It's Raining, It's Pouring

So, the big news at work is, we've been re-orged. Which is corporate for, we have a new boss and no one has a plan, but let's all pretend we're one big happy family and no one thinks layoffs are coming.

My old boss (and sub-boss, and sub-sub-boss) is an awesome human being. He was wearing camoflauge cargo shorts when I interviewed. His approach to life and work seems to be "do what you gotta do." Me likey.

My new boss (and there are no sub-bosses now. It goes from God, to Jerry, to you, to the cleaners) is - by all accounts - not so much with the sane. And, apparently, not so much with the flexible.

Which is why I dragged my sorry butt into work by 8:30 this morning. Of course, 8:30 is still later than I usually get in. But on a day like today, where the air is soft, the rain is steady, my head is banging, and I'm extremely sleep-deprived, how I would have loved it to be 9:30. Or 10:30. Or even a mental health day.

It serves me right. I was up before 5 a.m. yesterday and stayed up until very, very late, laughing and crying and shouting with joy at the teevee machine as I watched Obama's speech. And I kinda sorta broke the rules and had one or many glasses of wine to celebrate. So, I have no one to blame but myself.

But, still. It's really a day for lying in bed with a good book, a cup of tea, and a pile of kitties.

WE DID IT!

OBAMA 08!!!!!!!!!!!

Things You Don't Want to Hear at 9:30 on a Monday

My boss: "I don't know what to say. What do you say when the worst happens?"