Semper Fi and Thanks

Today is the official observation of Veteran's Day. In this time of war, Veteran's Day should - and does - mean more than a sale on cars and mattresses.

There have been many eloquent and poignant words of thanks spoken for our men and women protecting our way of life. I have no such eloquence to offer.

On Friday, I received an American flag from the local newspaper distributor. It was part of their "Welcome to the neighborhood / Subscribe to our newspaper" direct response package. I don't know what to do with it. The cynical part of me - the same part that sees someone wearing a cross around their neck and earmarks them for a bible-thumping, right-wing nutjob - wants me to run far, far away from the colors that don't run. The other part of me wants to fly it proudly, thankful for the truths this country stands (stood?) for.

And so, on this Veteran's Day, I find myself conflicted. How do I feel about America? I am proud that I can evaluate candidates and determine who to vote for without being under marshal law. I am sad that we are still involved in an occupation that isn't helping us, the country we're occupying, or anyone in between. I am proud that I can march on our nation's capital and sad that so few do.

So, my hesitant conclusion is that, although I might just pretend to be Canadian (or say "Scooby Doo!") when abroad, I know that I truly love this country and the ideals it stands for.

Thus, to all our men and women who "stand on a wall and tell us nothing bad's gonna happen tonight, not on our watch," ... I say Thank You.

And, to one special Army National Guardsman, I say a special thanks. You know why.

NaNo Is Eating My Soul

I'm one-third of the way through NaNo. And I'm happy to report that I'm currently over my projected word count. But not for long. Because I'm sitting in a coffeeshop and - ACK! - I have writer's block.

Maybe I just need to take a break. After all, my life has become writing and the gym. Writing at work. Writing after work. Writing at home. And the gym in between. Not much more. (Well, I'm still listening to NPR, but that's a given....)

The thing is, despite not knowing what to do with my novel, I'm re-writing everything else in the world around me. I was on the elliptical and found myself disagreeing with the plot twist in King of Queens. I rented Home for the Holidays last night and found myself completely changing the characterization between Robert Downey Jr. and Holly Hunter. (There's no WAY he wouldn't have invited her to his wedding. Right?) I'm even writing dialogue for the people sitting at the table behind me. (Because if he says one more thing about how cold it is outside, I'm gonna scream!)

So, not sure what to do about this conundrum inside of a puzzle, wrapped up in an enigma. Any ideas?

I Wish I Were a Better Yogini

Sure, on the surface, I look like a great student of yoga. I've been to three classes in as many days. Two of them Anusara. I even registered for another weekend intensive with Deb. So, yeah, I look like a great yogini. 'Cept I'm not.

During aforemention Wilfordpalooza, they served pizza. It's been a long time since I had pizza. I ate three pieces. While this may not seem overly outrageous, I was the only woman in the room who went back for thirds. So the guilt was a flowin. Thus, when it came time to yoga class, I was not holding back. Give me heat, give me an extra vinyasa, give me holding a pose one, two, three more breaths. I practically worked myself into the ground.

Today, I was pretty damn sore. Not to mention, emotionally I had a rough day. I arrived early to class and tried - really tried - to center myself. And I was doing a fairly good job. But then we did frog pose, which is a GINORMOUS hip opener. And my hips opened. And, as we all know, our hips hold LOTS of memories. And all I wanted to do was assume balasana and cry like a baby. But everyone else in class was moving on, progressing. I should keep up. Must. Do. Asana.

I'm getting used to a new job, moving into a new home in a new town, trying to write a novel in a month, and getting used to an entirely new schedule. This is probably the best time in the world for me to practice compassion with myself.

Instead, I'm pushing myself to the limit and probably not doing myself any favors (except for staying in the same weight class).

If I were truly a "good" yogini, I would be gentle with myself. Express gratitude with myself. For finding some time - any time - to practice and not stressing about it.

Hopefully - just maybe? - coming to this realization is one step closer to actually embodying it.

Wilfordpalooza

I had a very long post all written out in my head about setting down roots and having a home that I can call my own for longer than a year and all the "A Ha!" moments related to settling down that happened at the Samhain ritual on Saturday night. But I self-edited. Because you all probably don't care and because I've got to muddle it over in my head some more to make all the pieces fit together.

But sufice to say, I had a great, albeit jam packed weekend. There's just not enough hours in the day. But I did manage to go for a 2 hour walk around Gloucester. The waves were gigantic thanks to the remnants of Hurricane Noel and, paired with a bright sky, it was a perfect day for sitting on the shore. I hung some plants, found the local esoterica shop and even got some cooking done. I was a busy girl.

I also knew that today would be a busy day at work. I'm finally working on a project but, unfortunately, we're still figuring a lot of the moving parts out. So a lot of it is drafting up copy variations and seeing what sticks.

But at lunchtime, I did get to take a break and enjoy Wilfordpalooza.

What? you might be asking. Well, let me explain.

One of our big accounts is a "Diabeetus" testing supplies company. And their spokesman is Wilford Brimley. And even though he's awful to work with, he still pulls in the response. And it's time once again for us to script a Wilford commercial.

In preparation, the team got together to review all of the old Wilford commercials to review what worked, what didn't, and possible reasons why.

And then we got to watch this. Enjoy. And, remember, it's all about a healthy diet, exercise and checking your blood sugar and checking it often!

Blessed, Blessed Samhain

(For those of you not in "the know," that's pronounced "sow-in.")

It's time for the Celtic New Year. Not only one of the "high holy days" in the pagan and Wiccan calendar - a time when the veil between the worlds is thought to be at its thinnest, but the time when one ought to begin to turn inward. Examine one's life. Delve into the shadows to see what lies beneath.

I've never understood why people think Halloween is spooky or scary. We are taught to respect our elders and revere our forebears. So why do we think their departed spirits want to wander around, open and close cabinet doors, or smash pumpkins? It's beyond me...

What I plan on using this dark time for is to plunge the depths of my unconscious and use it to create a brand new world. A world of fiction, but one which speaks of truth. Yes, folks, it's NaNoWriMo time.

I also plan on using it to examine this new life of mine. This life that has me lingering long after yoga class talking to people about classes, teachers, styles, Thai restaurants, and fun places to go hiking. This life that has me waking up early enough to do a full hour plus of yoga, shower, eat, and still get to the office before the lion's share of people even arrive. This life that gives me the opportunity to hang out on a rocky cove at 8 am on a quiet Sunday morning, watching the storm clouds blow out.

It's going to be a good new year. I can feel it in my bones. Blessings.

Oh yea - in case you're wondering - the concert - AMAZING. Old hits, new hits, revamped hits. Death of a Disco Dancer reimagined. Stretch Out and Wait with an ... interesting ... dance interpretation. And, Dear God, Please Help Me with tears. I was in heaven. I laughed, I sang, I danced, I cried. I didn't get to kiss his Mozness, but just seeing his brilliance - I'm a happier person for it.